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Josh-D. S. Davis

Xaminmo / Omnimax / Max Omni / Mad Scientist / Midnight Shadow / Radiation Master

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Things to say to someone very much like me, but who doesn't live inside my head. Yet.
Josh 201604 KWP
The piece of yourself that you hide, hide from, and loathe completely
is the entire source of your unworthiness.

By refusing to accept that part, you refuse to accept yourself.
It will keep making you remember and reexperience it.

Each time will be harder than the last.
You will feel more resentful, unworthy, and alone.

Accept that this piece exists and is a part of you.
Mourn for it, because it cannot mourn for itself.
Then love it, because it cannot love itself.

You have the words and tools now.
Sing its song until it has said it's peace.
Never let it be forgotten.

We are all broken, severely, with things to work out.
Anyone who has nothing to work out is either lying, ignorant, or scared.

There are barriers to working things out.
Most of them are inside us, and we fabricate reasons to not fix them.

It's always easiest when you can have a sounding board.
Who can you use for a sounding board?

Family - don't want to let them down.
Friends - Don't want them to think you're weak and worthless or needy.
Therapists - Don't want firends and family to know. Can't trust them. Most of them are also average, so how could they dig into YOUR mind successfully? They cost money. etc.
Religious leaders - Uh, yah, how can you trust what you've been disenamored from?

Look in your life and find people who meet these criteria:
A) You think that they are smarter than you, or better than you, or for some unknown reason you respect or value them.
B) You wonder why they still hang around you, but for some reason they still do.
C) You know they must have faults, but you can't think of many that matter.

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Friends never think you're worthless, and true friends are there for you when you're weak and/or needy, and expect you to do the same for them when it's needy weak time for them.

wow. even though this post is surely directed at someone else...it feels like it was meant for me. these are precisely the feelings I've delt with lately. thanks for this post.

This is exactly what I was thinking when I read this.

What comes to mind from the influx of replies is "all men are created equal", assuming you use "men" as an appreviation for "human" and not for "male", and assuming you translate "created" into the appropriate paradigm for our cause of existance.

Yah, I sort of realized it can apply to almost anyone, but I did have a specific person in mind at the time who's stuck and on the crux of a life changing event. I can't write to them directly, because I fear that they would shut down from the direct presentation.

This came from looking into the different aspects and events they've experienced lately, and some barriers they are walking along, most visibly job related, but the job thing isn't the real problem. Their subconscious is using that as a way to keep them feeling this way.

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I don't think contentment is directly tied to actual resolution of our problems, as much as is our perceptions of what we have vs what we need.

In other words, there are plenty of content people who are scarey broken.

Ultimately, I think that resolving "things" is a lifelong process. There's always something to be honed, refined, or improved upon.

I'll concede that there are very few absolutes, so I won't rule out the possibility that there might people who have it all worked out. I just think that's so rare that we probably don't know any of those people.

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The reason for those criteria is that often people won't truly respect or fully accept the input of those who are felt to be inferior.

As for why anyone would be better, this would be very subjective, and would generally not be a blanket statement. Often it's someone with a specific insight or critical thinking ability which can supplant or augment one's own, skewed visions of themselves.

I definitely need "Rewording for Positive Impact" skills. That's one of my many lifelong goals. I spent hours trying to word it such that it even made sense. The second half didn't come out quite right, but the liklihood of the intended audience actually reading it before it scrolls off is fairly low.

Ultimately, I think the wording is probably OK for this person because they'll get the jist if they do find it. Maybe. Hopefully.

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Nah, I just am on the computer SO MUCH that my brief instances of clarity can occasionally be vomited into the ether.

I guess this probably wasn't for me, but a lot of it could have been.

It's because the best people are smart and aware of their brokenness.

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